author = “Claire Bolger” categories = “resources” date = 2023-07-01T04:00:00Z description = “Subtle tweaks, big results” facebook_discussion = "” featured_image = “/img/blog/threephrases.jpg” images = ["/img/blog/three-card-agenda-introverts.png”] keywords = [“introvers”, “facilitation”, “facilitators”, “facilitator tools”, “online facilitation”, “inclusive meetings”] photo_cred = “Claire Bolger” title = “Three Phrases to Eliminate from Your Facilitator Vocabulary”
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As facilitators, we know that the key to turning a good session into a great session can really come down to just a few words. Recently, we’ve been making concerted efforts to stay away from certain phrases when speaking with groups and found it has made a massive difference in engagement and willingness to participate.
“Brave souls”
When asking for volunteers, stay away from setting accidental high stakes. It’s may interrupt the psychological safety of the ask if you imply the only people who should volunteer have to be brave or courageous.
While the intention is to boost everyone’s confidence and acknowledge the risk, this phrase often has participants shrinking back into their seats.
Looking for a guaranteed way to get volunteers? Try this set of three activities!
“Best ideas”
Kicking off a brainstorm? Try to stay away from framing that the ideas volunteered should be the “best” or “most creative”. When we’re ideating as a group, it’s so easy to fall into groupthink or talk ourselves out of volunteering, so raising the bar at all creates another hurdle for participants to jump over in order to share.
(This is one of the many reasons we using Opposite Thinking—it’s much more fun & lower stakes to come up with “wrong” answers!)
“Obviously”
Answering questions? Steer clear of starting your sentence with the word “obviously”.
For more thoughts and best practices on answering questions, check out our blog post all about it!
All of these phrases are super common and it takes conscious effort (at first) to steer clear!
Oftentimes they are said with levity, but we shouldn’t underestimate the subtle messages that these words communicate to the group.
Want to dig deeper into the (subtle) art of facilitation? Sign up for the fall event series!